The Word That Had Me Change Focus This Year

Everything goes back to one thing - insight. That word means so much. It's your why. ― Moses Mbasu 'Buddha Blaze' Click To Tweet

The year began with some newlydead dreams overcast my life. After some time trying to prepare for a serendipitous moment, I tapped out and decided to just stop trying in the first place. Still, inside, there’d always be this nudging to try one more time (knowing full well that should I fail, I’d try again, no doubt, albeit slower).

So with my camera equipment on its way, I decided to take a leap of faith and do things as if no was out of the question. I went and pitched myself and my uncanny ability to spin anything into a TV show to a production house. The kind lady who is the co-founder only had one question for me, “What work have you done?”

“Nothing at the moment but my equipment will arrive this Sunday,” I responded a warmly. We were chatting on a Thursday. Lady had a point so even though I wondered how I’d do it, I decided that I’d start work on my Youtube channel the coming week.

The following day, Dave and I met Buddha Blaze. He’s been a friend to the both of us since our Slam Africa poetry days back in 2008 and knowing that he had played a significant part in conceptualizing Coke Studio Africa and BLAZE BYOB show, I picked his brain on what I’d need to get stuff going TV wise behind the scenes.

Like the quote at the start of the post, he probably said insight in response to every question.

It was obvious, wasn’t it? Turns out in Kenya and the world really, reality TV shows with big budgets aren’t done with the primary goal of having a feel good ‘believe-in-yourself-artist-or-youth’ end game. Those are by-products.

He said, “Big companies only throw money at a problem. That’s it. And when the problem is solved, they’ll pull the shows.” Perhaps I’ll get to share our discussion in detail or ask for a motherload of a favour and have him on my Youtube channel soon. Godspeed.

And it was a light bulb moment for me. To get a lot of my stuff off the ground, I’d need insight into pressing issues companies are facing and creatively solve their problems for them. It left me conflicted, me who wants to paint self-belief, confidence and joy in TV shows not just make a problem go away, but it also left my mission expanded.

I believe Dave and I have a mission to help the arts and creativity become mainstream, celebrated and even a tool to inspire and plug positivity (and dreaming again) back into the country. Of course this needs a lot to change in Kenya legislation wise and in pretty much all sectors but for me to do it, I’d need to do the grunt work of solving problems their way before I can show people that my way can work too.

So hope is still alive.

My ideas are making room to fit company visions and my goals too because, let’s face it, taking the path less traveled makes for a new path. I love how Carrie illustrated it on her IG account at the start of the year.

There is no path. The path is made by walking

Something based on a quote I saw during my trip to England. It was in the Bishops Palace gardens at Wells, etched on a stone, and it really stuck with me: "There is no path, the path is made by walking" . . Credit the words to Antonio Machado (thanks, Google!). I actually drew this awhile ago because I had been feeling pretty down and lacking in purpose/direction. There are times when I really feel like I don't have my shit together…that I don't know what I'm working toward and am somehow "falling behind" when it comes to reaching life (societal?) goalposts. This is just a good reminder that my future isn't written yet, that there is no guideline that I should be following, and that with each step I take I have the power to choose my own life. There is no path but the one we make. And sometimes that also means owning our choices and their consequences. It's just really easy to forget that sometimes. #sorryforthesap #sketchbook #watercolor #weefoxes #doodle #kuretake #ink #antoniomachado #thereisnopath #mypathistramplingonflowers

A post shared by Carrie L (@cisforfrenchfry) on Dec 1, 2017 at 7:15pm PST

I happened to watch Chadwick Boseman’s Howard University commencement speech yesternight (which will be a week ago when you read this) and he was on the same wavelength about purpose and holding your ground even when it seems unfavourable for you.

“It takes a lot to plant seeds whose shade you won’t enjoy,” paraphrased because my husband always says something along the same lines.

You could tell he’s thankful to be living in the fruit of his intentionality and he was overwhelmed by his journey in hindsight. It was a hard road with a few let downs, but when you think about it, we’re most grateful for the things that come hard, not easy.

So I guess that’s where I’ll end this post.

There is no path. The path is made by walking - Antonio Machado Click To Tweet

Said it one more time in case you forgot.

xo,